Wednesday, May 30, 2007


So it's time to quickly review two movies, Pirates of the Carribean 3 and Spiderman 3.

They're jumpy. "Pirates" is jumpy because is so confusing. Gene Seymour summarized it well, "It won't matter whether you've seen the first two Pirates movies or not. You'll still be confused." Still, it felt much more entertaining than the second one. It was jumpy because there were way too many plots that were not explained adequately.

Spiderman 3, I thought, was entertaining enough, but it seemed to drag. There was a lot of emotion from the characters, but somehow, the reader didn't really have to connect with them. Of course, as a Spiderman movie, one might expect a bit more action, and this one was lacking something to liven it up. Also there were a few loose ends, and plot elements that didn't seem to logically follow; some major events that should have triggered some other things were simply ignored, and in this way, it was jumpy. It's hard to talk about a movie in the abstract so as to not give away spoilers, but if and when you see it, you'll probably understand what I'm saying. It did have a few hilariously intentional irrelevant items.

So, the consensus is that both movies were disappointing. Of course, people will see them, because the machine we call Hollywood is beyond our control! Studios can make a terrible film for a hundred million, and audiences will flock the theaters, buy the DVDs, succumbing to the advertising. If a studio pours a hundred million into a terrible film, advertise if for five million, and then make 2oo or 300 million, it's a great success! I am, of course, making up these numbers out of thin air, with no authority or basis whatsoever.

You know, sales of movie tickets and DVDs have been declining, and many people have been quick to blame piracy. Sure, that probably contributes to it, but there's a much bigger factor here. The movies are getting worse and worse! If these are the summer blockbusters that Hollywood has to offer, they're in bigger trouble. They have a lesson to learn. If they make good movies, they will regain all those ticket sales. If they continue to push bad movies, they will lose money, and fans. It's that simple. So many small, relatively low budget films that are really well made are remembered by the public, and when they make a ton of money, it's due to merit. Films like Napoleon Dynamite, and My Big Fat Greek Wedding. Those were sleepers. Anyway, I forgot what my point was here. Watch good movies, and don't watch bad ones. That pretty much applies to everything in life. Do good, not bad. The discretion is yours.

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